There is a big difference between being assertive and being aggressive, and you should not be confused of their distinction.
It’s really difficult to be assertive when you don’t know the first thing about it. You’ll only start second-guessing yourself regarding other people’s sensitivity. You may start asking yourself questions about things you should say or not say, and whether things you do may hurt the feelings of others. These are some of the more common things you might be thinking of when you try to be assertive. When you start second-guessing yourself, it means you’re not really sure of what you’re doing. If you want to learn how to be assertive properly, consider joining the Assertiveness and Self-Confidence Training Course by PD Training in Singapore.
Most people admire those who can freely speak their minds and are always confident, but at the same time able to respect the ideas and feelings of others. These are traits of a good leader because leaders should be followed because of respect, not fear.
Aggressiveness, on the other hand, usually leads to misunderstandings, hurt feelings and broken egos. This shouldn’t occur in an office environment. Everyone there is working for the same company and teams that don’t know how to work together will not be successful.
Of course, being aggressive can be useful at times but should not be a frequent occurrence, as it may not sit well with most people.
Distinctions Between Assertive and Aggressive
If you’re usually drawn to fight fire with fire, it may be a sign that you’re more aggressive than assertive. If you are aggressive, it may take awhile before you get back on solid ground with people. If you like to belt out commands instead of asking, it’s also a clear sign that you definitely need to tone it down.
On the other hand, if you like to gently nudge others and allow them some amount of freedom in what they’re doing, you’re most likely on the right track. Gaining the respect of others is always a sign of good leaders who are assertive and not aggressive.
How Being Assertive Affects the Office
Aggressive people may say things such as, “It’s my way or the highway,” and no one would listen. An assertive person, on the other hand, is friendly, confident and makes eye contact when he/she speaks to someone. Those who are assertive believe in teamwork, and would usually use the term “we” more frequently than “I”. They give credit where credit is due and would commend the team on a job well-done, rather than taking all the credit personally.
Always be alert when it dealing with people. Know your timing and judge the true reactions of the people around you. Never resort to fighting fire with fire. Instead, always pause when you feel like you’re getting mad. Don’t do anything rash that may affect the mood of the entire office, as well as doing something you may regret. Remember that the content of what you are communicating may get lost, depending on how you say it.
Work is not a warzone where you are always out for the kill. Consider a more savvy approach where everyone is your friend. This is more likely to help you achieve your goals. To further your skills, PD Training in Singapore is always ready to guide you in reaching your personal goals.
PD Training delivers thousands of professional development courses each year in Singapore so you can be assured your training will be delivered by a qualified and experienced trainer.
All public Assertiveness & Self-Confidence Training courses include am/pm tea, lunch, printed courseware and a certificate of completion. Customised courses are available upon request so please contact pdtraining at [email protected] to learn more.